Well, if Jane does die, it will be a comfort to know she was in pursuit of Mr. Bingley.

I wanted to have some cute quote from Pride and Prejudice in my title but I ran across this one and I thought it was befitting.

How many times do we "die", spiritually, in the pursuit of our own Mr. Bingley.

I know that I am not exactly single, in fact I'm quite near the opposite.

But I remember the days when I would crush on any and every guy, feeling as if my life would never quite be complete without a man. I know I'm not alone in this feeling. It's amazing how sometimes we can let our parents, our culture and our own bleeding hearts convince us that it is okay to "die" in the pursuit of a man.

We lose our satisfaction in Christ. We lose our trust in His sovereignty. We take control and determine our own destiny. Because "naturally", we humans, who are as the dust of the earth, we must know how life should play out.

I guess I just wanted to write this as an encouragement to all ladies. Single and those in relationships.

It is not as if I still don't struggle with lofting unrealistic expectations on Reed. I realize how much I truly expect the perfectly cute, Mr. Bingley out of him. How I still pursue my completeness in Him. It is folly and ridiculous pursuit and I am still working on just loving him and not expecting Him to be my savior.

I'm not saying Reed isn't wonderful, but I'm just saying that looking from the outside in, it seems so comical that we are so willing to damage ourselves for feeling "loved". That is not real love. Christ is real love.

Watching the movie pride and prejudice, no one can help but laugh inside when Mr. Bennett makes the comment that it is a comfort to know Jane might die in pursuit of Mr. Bingley. I'm not sure if Jane Austin meant it or not, but she has tapped into probably one of the biggest struggles woman have...this fear of not having someone love you in the end. Everyone around sees that it is making you sick, that you could die and they see how trivial a man is compared to the vitality of life....but still we pursue.

I don't know if much of this makes sense, but I know that there has got to be a healthier balance in life.

Are men wonderful? Yes! I love Reed so incredibly much.

But neither of us would know how to love each other fully if not for the all surpassing love of God.

We both have to continually shed this idea that we "complete" each other. Were we made for each other? Most definitely. But the piece that will complete us is a true, real, honest, deep, raw and meaningful relationship with Christ.

I have to be careful of the times that I put Reed in a position that makes him become my everything. He physically, emotionally and spiritually cannot be my everything. He is a human. I'm still learning this. I'm still trying to put into perspective and proper balance how relationships should be in our lives.

Just some thoughts on Valentine's.

Love is what makes the world go round. God is love.